He Speaks

I love that music can have the power to speak for us when we can't find the exact words to verbalize.

We can resonate with an artist's lyrics even if the specific experience that we went through was completely different than what had orginally inspired the musician to write these words. It is as though they, these words, have been perfectly placed to reach our hearts. This is connection.

I was told that I did not have to come back to counsel for the last week of camp because I would probably need the time to mourn the loss of a friend. His death was so sudden.

I said to assume that I was coming back unless I contacted them.

On the surface, it doesn't make a lot of sense to go a funeral for a friend and then go a to a worship concert later on the same day.

My eyes red and my heart weary, I forced myself to worship with the band Starfield after I had attended Kyle and his father's funeral with over six hundred people.

Speechless.

As a vocalist, it comes natural for me to sing.

...Unless the song touches me so much that I lose the ability to even speak.

My pastor once said that in worship, tears are a sign of God healing us. If this is true, then during that concert, I may have hardly sung.

...but I experienced His healing.

It was as if these worship songs that Starfield played that night were played just for me. They struck such a deep chord in my heart.

That I could no longer sing.

I struggled to keep singing until I finally surrendered and chose to listen to Him. As I wrestled with the decision of going back to camp, I let the musicians sing for me these truths that He wanted me to hear.

I told Him that my cup was empty. I have nothing left to give.
He told me to let Him fill it.
I said that I had no strength left to counsel these girls.
He said...In Me, you do.
I asked Him to use someone else,
But He said
...I already chose you.

Just as I let these musicians sing these words that I could not sing, I let God give me the strength that I did not have to impact these girls my last week of camp.

All because He moved this band named Starfield to write these songs that during that night

...Spoke to me.

"Here I am
As gold to the fire
I will surrender to Your hand
To this place
Lord, I have come ready for Your touch

It's all for You
It's all for You
I'm letting go
I'm letting go"

--Starfield "All for You"