Reverse Culture Shock...Or Something Like That

One of my coworkers warned me about the reverse culture shock that I would experience upon moving back home. Mind you, I had been home for Christmas break and didn't experience too much of the culture shock, so I briefly acknowledged the fact that it might happen and then proceeded to change the subject.

I noticed the obvious things at first:
The grass is a lot greener (literally).
There is a lot more traffic.
I no longer live in a family that consists of 35 students and 4 coworkers.
The sun doesn't stay up until midnight.
Canada doesn't seem so close
...And I am no longer surrounded by mountains.

But the longer I stay here, the more I realize:
Life has moved on (people date, break up, get married, have babies, etc).
I have changed a lot
...while others may not have changed much in the last year.
I'll say inside jokes from Alaska
...but then remember that I have to explain them because these people weren't with me there.
I'll say common Native phrase like 'Poor, I jokes, adii, or quyana'
...and receive really interesting looks.
When people ask me about Alaska,
I dive into a lengthy story only to realize that most people only want to hear the 2.5 second-5 minutes tops version of your story.
I've realized that people are more inclined to ask "How is Alaska?"
Rather than, "How are you?"
...I just tell them that Alaska is beautiful.
I guess we can leave it at that unless they inquire for more.

It is the strangest thing.
To be a new person and come back to a place that you have known for ten plus years.
Something so familiar,
Yet you feel so out of place.
This past year I had a clearly defined purpose (granted, it wasn't an easy one).
We fought hard in a spiritual battle for nine months.
It took its toll on us, but it in no means was a failure.
Lives were transformed through Him
...Including my own.

Reverse Culture Shock

It is hard to tell what is reverse culture shock for me right now.
I'm experiencing a myriad of emotions
Some related to the post traumatic stress (I'm being medically evaluated in a little over a week)
Some related to the loss of a culture and gain of a familiar one
And some from just being completely and utterly weak.

But there is one thing that I know:
I may have returned home less,
But in Him I have been made greater.
Yes, this was not a failure.
It was an eternal victory.